I love my husband. I love my family. I love my children.
I cherish these things more than anything.
From the beginning we had planned to have 3 children 5 years apart. As one would go into Kindergarten I would have another baby. This for me, made sense. It was easier when my youngest was independent for me to take on the new demands of another little one. My oldest two, from a previous marriage were 3 years apart and this was very demanding. We waited until my second child one was in school before having our third and that worked out just perfect. There was time for the baby during the day and I didn't feel like anyone was feeling left out, then there was time for the older ones after school, we did homework while he took a nap. They played with him while I cooked dinner and it just seemed to work out well for us. So, we decided to contiune our family and had our fourth baby the summer before Little J entered Kindergarten. Then we would wait until that little one entered kindergarten.... The plan, not a perfect plan, but a plan nevertheless...
Well, the plan was interupted by a death in the family, loss of employment and a move.
It was sad not having a new little one when our Little G went to kindergarten, but it just wasn't time. Finally, feeling settled in, we started trying once again to have a baby and it just wasn't happening.
As I had stated in an earlier blog. I went to lunch with a dear friend of mine, one of my "bookies" (book club friends). She is about ten years my senior, we were talking about this yearning, and she told me that she just now felt comfortable with the idea that she would not be having any more children. I thought this interesting...is it possible that there will always be a yearning in my heart for a baby if I never have one? Is this a normal part of being a woman, wanting to nuture and care? I just could not imagine not having the child we had be wanting for so long, but I finally decided that it was in God's hands.
Well, a few weeks later, I found out that I was expecting. It seems that when I was having this discussion with my friend, I was already pregnant. :)
We are so happy and blessed to have a new little one join our family.
I have already had some question this decision, which I find odd but...everyone has different feelings and thinking on the matter.
Yes, I am older, and though it may seem too old for some and that there is a lot of space in between...and we are starting all over again...well, We are just happy about all of that.
My grandmother, my mother in law, my nurse's mother, the women who took my blood, friends at church and many others have had babies in there 40's. It is not that uncommon to have a baby after 40, look at all the celebraties having babies in their 40's.
Yes, there are risks, but there is always a risk.
Our Doctor asked Mister D and I, if we wanted to have special testing to see if the baby had any genetic defects, if in any case we would not want to continue with the pregnancy. Our repsonse was that we want this child no matter what.
It will be a blessing from our Heavenly Father.
There is so much love and joy in a big family.
I want my family to have that....
more than anything ....
I want my family to feel that.
I have the privledge to be a stay at home mom, to spend all my days with them and for them. It is a blessing to be a mother and though it comes with its challenges, I wouldn't change them for the world. I love being a Mother.
We told our family and dearest and closest friends that we are expecting another little one...and Little G, being so excited told her best friend at school, and that night she told her Mom at church, where many other school moms attend with their children...and the news was all over the playground the next day. (Much sooner than we had anticipated, as it is customary to wait until the first trimester is over.)
So if you've heard...it's not a rumor and if I haven't said anything to you, it's probably because I assume you already know. :)
I am officially out of my first trimester!
A new "Little" is on its way!
(Estimated June 1st.)
Also, as a side note: I had mentioned that when we orginally went to the Doctor, she noticed two amniotic sacs, but being so early she wanted us to come back in a few weeks. Though there might have been a chance for two, there in fact is only one.